Ruminations From the Church

Take great strides when you walk on water.

We at the Church of No Preference are virtually addicted to sayings, maxims, mottos, truisms, and old saws. We just have this love for ruminating on those things.

To Ruminate;
1 : to go over in the mind repeatedly and often casually or slowly
2 : to chew repeatedly for an extended period
intransitive senses
1 : to a chew again what has been chewed slightly and swallowed : chew the cud
2 : to engage in contemplation

To be clear, we don't chew repeatedly on something already slightly chewed, particularily an old saw. That would be awful. But we do engage in contemplation of old sayings, and new sayings for that matter. Here are some sentences that have gotten our minds nearly blown.

If you could touch everything, you'd have lots of foreign particles on your fingers.

If you can rule the world, then no more power to you.

Cross your fingers, wiggle your nose, raise an eyebrow, breath deeply, twist your hips, click your heels, and if you did all that, I've got some trash in my garage to sell you.

Every new day is a reason to rip off the previous day on the daily calendar.

When life gets you down, scream out your window, "I'm mad as hell and I won't take it anymore." Then take a nap.

Reach for the stars, but be careful not to get charged with harrassment.

You can keep your head high or keep your head down, just be sure to keep your head above water.

Don't forget to bring your brains, they might come in handy.

Where there's smoke there's fire and where there's fire there's going to be a pile of ashes.

God is big!

Nerfballs should be called softballs and softballs should be called "bigger than hardballs, yet a wee bit softer, BALLS."

You're in love when you get that funny tingling in your stomach, or you're on a rollercoaster, or both as love IS a rollercoaster.

Sticks and stones may break my bones but names will never hurt me. Well, the names do bug me and please disarm yourself of those stones and sticks.

The world is insane, just ask the news.

So there you have the latest sayings to ruminate upon. Remember, do not chew them repeatedly or at least be sure to swallow them whole. But I suggest that the best way to ruminate these thoughts of wisdom is to lay back in a big cushy sofa with your favorite beverage by your side and partake of them slowly. Stay out of the kitchen while thinking about them, you'll get distracted from thinking rumination to chewing rumination.